The Long Battle

We've been talking about potty training for a while now and have even had a training seat hanging around in the bathroom, trying to get Luke to try it out. No luck. This kid is absolutely NOT interested. My friends with older boys, as well as Luke's pre-school teacher have said that I shouldn't try too hard if he's not interested/ ready. And I have to admit, that was a nice excuse to hide behind. And diapers are actually easy compared to a potty-training toddler.

But this past weekend, faced with the fact that Luke is turning 3 soon, plus the fact that some future activities require potty-training, (compounded by feelings of parental guilt) we came to the unfortunate realization that we actually need to start TRYING to train him. He certainly won't be ready if we don't make an effort. I have a sad feeling that this, which right now feels like a difficult parenting task, will be NOTHING when he reaches the tween & teen years. Sigh.

So, since abruptly kicking up the potty training efforts on Saturday we have encouraged/ forced Luke to sit on the regular toilet or even on the little portable one in front of the TV. However, all we've heard is "get me off of here!" "it's sticky on here!" "I need a fresh diaper!" "I don't have to go!" Each morning he has spent 20 minutes perched on the toilet, complaining all the way, only to poop in his diaper or underwear immediately after being removed from the throne, like he was just getting back at us for making him sit there.

I've heard that one of the tricks to potty training is to stay at home all day and frequently remind the child to go to the toilet, bring them in there and read books, etc. Well that hasn't worked. I've also heard that positive reinforcement in the form of treats works...nope, not for this kid. Since this guy loves juice, we told him that he cannot have any unless he goes on the potty. And what do you know? He hasn't asked for it once since. Luke is a stubborn one for sure; you might recall that he has refused milk--his former favorite beverage--since we took away his bottle about a year ago. 

Yesterday, so frustrated that he'd had only accidents and no action on the potty in four days, I even tried negative reinforcement (aka. you'll have a time-out if you poop in your pants.) That didn't work either.

Well, today he pooped in the potty:

Now, he was with Pilar and she had had him on there for nearly an hour, so it's not like he realized he had to go, went in and got it done... but still HE DID IT! For the FIRST TIME! 

I came into the house just as it was happening and both Pilar and I made a BIG DEAL about it. He was very proud and immediately asked for his treat (gummy fruit snacks).

Of course, he then peed in his underwear three times during the rest of the day. On the last time, he did come to me, walking with his legs straddled apart, saying he had to pee when of course he already had. But maybe he's picking up on it. Or maybe he was still high from the pride and gummy fruit snacks.

We'll see tomorrow, when I force him onto the potty again. 

Luke is very independent and capable on many fronts, but we expect this one to be a long and frustrating battle. At least we're prepared for that.